There's No Need To Pretend

Pondering.

Over thinking.

You can call it whatever you want.

Have I learned to stop doing that.. apparently not. Let go of the past.

Every time I remember that old, nasty stuff I just want to run as far as possible. 

I can joke about it in some situations, but otherwise I won't mention it.

No, I have to hide it deep, deep down where not even me can find it. But that is going to be impossible since I'm such a fool. And the biggest question is why it keeps popping up in my mind all the time. Phew. Grrauh. 

And then it quickly transforms to anger, hatred, sadness and other really bizarre feelings. 

Whatever. "Don't say maybe if you want to say no" Should learn to do that more often. 

Why is it so hard to forget? 

Repressed memories. I would want to be able to organize the things I don't want to remember. It's quite a lot actually when it's 20 years of  unnecessary shit to carry around.

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Anyhow, I managed to get this from the store today. 

Just want to see if it works that's all.

I've been testing the silver shampoo but I don't know if I see any changes in my hair so let's see if this works wonders.

Until next time,







Haadi

I Got Them Moves

Oh God, where should I start. 

I feel so empty.. and stressed. I don't know what I should prioritize. I have too many 'should I' in my mind right now. I shouldn't make such a big deal of it but still it's spooking in the back of my mind. I know that in order to get into any school I have to start reading n.o.w. but I have the other thing coming up before that. Siigh. Oh well. Just general anxiety about these things.

here's a couple of pictures 

 not my cake no no, my brother's birthday cake. 

 this happened yesterday, parteey.

I'm going to spend the rest of the evening watching some Mentalist and Ch. P.D.

Haadi

You Cannot Be Serious

Hey.

So yesterday I didn't manage to think nor do anything clearly. I felt so dizzy with all the painkillers. I think I never have experienced that kind of headache and agonizing pain in my body. Some kind of flu trying to overtake me. Just like someone was trying to dig out my eyes from my head.

Anyways I have started reading for my exam now and I must say that everything is much more interesting now than back then. I didn't care enough to get really good grades, I just wanted those courses to be over and pass them. 

Nighters,

Haadi

Who Are You To Judge

My priorities are from the a$$. Like literally. My motivation is at the rock bottom, which it shouldn't be right now. I have that freaking exam in two months and a shitload to read. Shame on me hah. 
I don't even remember how to make notes anymore jeez. 
And I have some minor stress about where I'm going to apply in a couple of months or so. I know two study subjects so to say but the two others I have had on my mind is a bit of a blur. I have been thinking about a different town and that sort of thing but we'll see what I decide. 
Couldn't someone give me a sign please I have a hard time deciding in this head of mine. Well, I have plenty of time, not. 









Blah blah and so on.

this shirt though ♥   (weheartit)







G'night,






Haadi